Week 3 days 4-5: sorry!

1500+ calories...yikes!!!!!!

A'salaamu alaikum ya'll. I was really tired last night and ended up going to bed before I made my post. My sincerest apologies. :-)

I didn't do well the day before. Now again, I say that but I am still within my points, I just know I made poor choices. For example:

I went to Applebee's yesterday. Now they have a WW menu there (not why I went, we live in a small town and I was tired of fish sandwiches from McD's!) but I didn't pick from it. I wanted the Crispy (big warning!) Orange Chicken Bowl. Another bad thing: I didn't check the calories before I went which would have been easy. Now WW doesn't count calories per se but I know if something logs heavy it will be high in points (duh!). So unprepared out I go.

I fully intended to share it with Aaminah (it's pretty big and I can't eat it all myself) but it has a sweet-n-spicy sauce (YUM!). So I ordered sauce on the side to share with her but by the time I ordered her a drink and fries it was cheaper just to buy her a kids' meal and let her graze off my plate as she wanted. So another big mistake: having a huge portion with no built-in failsafe. :-)

I ate more than I normally would (?) but still had about 1/3 leftover. (I also shared some with her but I like to over-project, not under, on my points.) Alhamdulillah! I forgot our box of take-home. I am happy because I would have finished it off that night.

Remember my weekly points target is 31? Well this dish clocks in at 42!!!!! The 2/3 I possible ate put me at 28 points for that dish alone. Oh my goodness! I had no idea! So I did a fair amount of damage with that little meal and pretty well demoralized myself. I tried to watch the rest of my day but of course ended up dipping into my discretionary points. Grrrr! I wanted to wean myself off of them but looks like that won't be this week!

Anyway yesterday was a bit of poo and today wasn't too much better; I went over my target by a few points and am down to about 18 discretionary points. I really wanted to make this my week to shine and lose more than my 1.8 I lost last week. I don't think it will happen.

I've been kind of active with some little things here and there but not real exercise. I realized this is my week to crave food (in relation to where I am in my cycle) so it did help me to quit mentally beating myself up. Insha'allah I can stay on track these next 2 days and then next week is a new chance!

Ma salaama ya'll....

Week 3 day 3: I've done better

Curse you, Oreos!!!!!

A'salaamu alaikum ya'll. So today wasn't my best day. You see, I brought sweets into the house. Yes, I know, silly me. Now don't get me wrong, on a normal day Oreos would NOT be my drug of choice. I love soft yellow cake with milk chocolate icing. Yummmmmmm..... (drooling a little, pardon me!) But as I haven't really had any sweets in a while, those Oreos were looking pretty good.

I had 8 of them. Ohhhh the shame! But it's also the truth so maybe this will embarass me sufficiently so I no longer do this type of thing. Oh I didn't eat them all at once, you know cookies are like the shaitaan; they whisper to you so softly and sweetly. Before you know it, 8 are down the hatch.

I intended to have 3 this morning when I got up for a drink. I was hungry and thought, oh cookies! lol I ended up eating 2 more because I stood there by the open bag. BIG MISTAKE.

Later after dinner I let the kids have some and I took 3 more. Not the end of the world but I am not pleased. I don't want to stop my weight loss or slow it down. I want to continue forward. I have to just set my mind to these types of things being occasional and limited in quantity. I think at this stage you have to really start making some serious changes in your eating habits. The other day I didn't eat breakfast because I wanted a less-than-ideal lunch. OK so A+ for planning but is this intelligent eating? (Remember the phrase I coined? lol). I have to do some behavior modification to help me overcome these obstacles.

Anyway I think I told you (did I?) that my daily points are down to 31 from 32. But I consistently eat more because I have those 49 discretionary points. Dang them! I don't really know how to feel about them. Sometimes I am happy and sometimes I think they are sneaky little saboteurs... time will tell, time will tell. :-)

Today I clocked 38 points, 7 more than my target but still well within my weekly extra points. I guess I have to ask myself what I want more, extra food or faster weight loss? Ahhhh again, time will tell, time will tell. :-)

Ma salaam ya'll!

Week 3 day 2: yup

A'salaamu alaikum ya'll. We have another winter storm here; the kids were out of school today and will be tomorrow as well. :-( Stress-eating anyone? lol

I did good on the plan today. My points target has dropped from 32 to 31 because of my weight loss. Which is a little weird cause I still have 49 discretionary points. I don't think I'll use as many this week as I did the last two because I really want my weight loss to gain momentum, not lose it. We'll see how that works out, insha'Allah. :-)

I was too tired tonight to do my cartoon; I have a bad back and I kinda slipped it out a little. My entire right side hurts from lower back to hip to calf. Insha'allah it'll get better in a few days. It usually does.

Oh I overdid it on breakfast again. Yah, I know, surprise. So I just had a very light supper, tomato soup with a few goldfish crackers. I prefer saltines but obviously so do the kids cause there were none here. lol I made black forset turkey ham sandwiches for lunch; really they are very good but I do like cheese and mayonnaise so that cut into my daily totals a bit. Worth it, though, to not have to choke down a dry sandwich!

Insha'Allah I'll do a better post tomorrow, I'm just too tired right now. Ma salaama ya'll!

Week 3 day 1: hi five!

A'salaamu alaikum ya'll. Yep that's right, I've posted a loss 2 weeks in a row, boo-yah! I lost 1.8 pounds (see my "one pound at a time" ticker for my progress) and I feel ok about that. I KNOW that 1-2 pounds ia a safe weight loss per week, the type that is likely to STAY GONE, and means loss of FAT not loss of MUSCLE. Still... I have that little voice inside that says, if you had just done this or if you hadn't eaten that you could have lost MORE.

But I am ignoring that little voice. I am embarking on a new (physical) me and I don't want to get sidetracked by some invisible nay-sayer. :-) Alright that makes a grand total of 4.6 pounds lost, almost a fiver!!! Another way to think of this is the following:

1. I have lost almost 1 bag of sugar/flour (in the US a 5 lb bad is the norm)
2. I have lost 9 STICKS OF BUTTER. Wow that one is a gross visual but more accurate as it's fat too!
3. I have lost the equivalent weight of over a half gallon of water. Those are heavy to carry!!!

Nasty? Yes. Inspiring? you betcha!!!!

I personally like the above visual. So THAT is why my underpants are looser!!! 5 pounds of fat takes up far more room than 5 pounds of muscle so when we lose fat we notice a definite difference in our appearance, how our clothes look, etc. I am excited!!!

Not sure if I'll post later; I think this should suffice!

Week 2 day 7: early post

Aww, happy lil sun!

A'salaamu alaikum ya'll. I just wanted to do a quick little post for today; I'm going to be pretty busy and not sure if I can get to it later. A quick word on my eating today: I made a really nice breakfast today but I ate very intelligently. Intelligent eating, I like that phrase. :-) I did cave in and buy some mini-muffins (gingerbread and pumpkin) but I only ate one so it fit nicely. A sweet treat without much damage to my points. Only 2!

Some of you might be wondering why I set my goal for only 150 lbs. I know many women would be MORTIFIED to weight that much, especially at my rather dimunitive 5'1" height. (I used to be 5'3" but I have some compressed vertebrae so :-P). I on the other hand really don't like being skinny. Slender. Svelte. Bony. However you wanna put it. I have weighed as little as 140 and really I didn't like how I looked. I felt like I was all bones and sharp angles. I know, laugh it up. :-D I can appreciate that it's en vogue to be thin but I don't desire to fit that mold.

Alhamdulillah I am built solid; I am sure I came from good, sturdy peasant stock, used to carrying baskets of turnips to market. :-)) I don't need to be reassured by fashion magazines that I look good to anyone else. I want to be HEALTHY, I want to be ACTIVE, and yes, I want to be beautiful to my husband.

Beyond and above that, I really couldn't care.  It's very liberating to feel that way, and I will admit I haven't in a long time. I've been unhappy being so round, so chubby, OK, so fat. However, when I am just me, just Jeanna, the way I am happiest with myself, I really don't care how anyone else sees me.

And that is priceless. :-) Ma salaama ya'll.....



Week 2 day 6: doin' good

Underwear denial; it ain't pretty! lol

A'salaamu alaikum ya'll. Alhamdulillah I had a good days in many respects but I did use 8 of my discretionary points. I still have 15 left for the week which ends tomorrow so I am doing great (I am able to use all of them but of course, my weight loss would be on the lower end).  I ate ok but as usual it was my weekend schedule which threw me out of whack.

I ended up getting a kid's meal at Wendy's because I have to drive out to Worcester (22 min away) twice a day on Saturdays to take the kids to their Arabic and Qur'an class.
It never fails, I don't plan correctly and I am stuck grabbing something less than ideal. And to be honest, a part of me wants it that way because I do like that kind of food sometimes. So I try to plan around it so I can do that and not blow my plan.

However I had woken up early this morning (about 4:30 am) and had a small snack and some milk. I have some stomach issues and sometimes if my stomach is empty it really needs some milk to settle it. (I also take medication but I still have some discomfort). So that started my day out with 5 points off. Oh well.

Dinner tonight was really nice. I grilled lean steak and made steamed broccoli, baked yukon gold potatoes, tossed salad, and fresh crusty rolls from the local Brazilan bakery. I guess because I am getting used to not eating as much I just couldn't eat half of what I had.

I ended up eating 2oz of my 3 oz steak, a nice portion of broccoli (point-free and good!) and about half of my potato. Yukon golds are smaller, round potatoes so I really had very little. I took about 1/3 of a roll and shared the rest; really I was satisfied. I save my salad and leftover steak for lunch tomorrow so insha'Allah I will eat healthy.

A good thing about my family is they really like healthy food. Hafsa, my oldest stepdaughter, loves salad without dressing! Zainab, the next in line, will eat anything masha'Allah and Yousef, my husband's youngest, is pretty good too though not as adventurous. Aaminah (my light and joy) will eat anything but she loves a typical Mediterranean meal: olive oil, bread, olives, and salad. Masha'Allah! Anyway it's really not so hard because my husband is also very accomodating; as long as I cook to be healthy and meet our religious requirements, he is all set. :-)

If this is TMI I apologize but I have to share. You know I said in a previous post that because of how I dress loosely and modestly I don't always notice when I gain a couple of pounds (or 15!) Well that maybe true of my outer clothes but inner clothes still tell the tale. So how did I really have to face the fact I had widened my already sizeable load?

I outgrew mah drawers. :-)) Yep that's right, my underpants got too tight. I almost bought a bigger size and then I stopped cold. I was like, what?? Just buy a bigger size, THAT'S your good idea??? Alhamdulillah I started WW that next week. I decided enough was enough when I coulnd't wear my underwear because they had gotten too tight! lol

Sorry I told ya'll this would be honest. You wanted the truth, but can you HANDLE the truth?? lol

Ma salaama ya'll!

Week 2 day 5: a dilemma!

I detest chocolate-covered sprinkled dougnuts but it made the best presentation. lol

A'salaamu alaikum ya'll. So I am sure by now you have guessed what is bugging me: should I eat that doughnut I brought home today or forgo it? Today is the FIRST day I've been totally within my points. To the exact limit, 32. And it wasn't by design. I tallied up my dinner at the end of the night and bada boom, bada bing, there you go.

I still have 30 discretionary points left for the week. 30. 3 0. THIRTY. Wow I am super-psyched. Should I eat them or leave 'em? I really want to post a loss again this week. As I am following plan (staying within my point range) I can indeed realistically expect the same 2+ pound weight loss.

But I am afraid. If  I eat them and I DON'T lose, maybe I'll get frustrated and give up. If I don't eat them, they go away at the end of the week and that's it, they are gone. Hmmmm quandary. :-) I am leaning heavily towards to doughnut right now.

Here is my argument for eating said deep-fried delicacy: Um, hello? What didn't you understand? I just said DEEP-FRIED, the fat girl's best friend. Oh you want more than that? I can wax poetic about a properly made, lightly glazed, light-as-a-feather doughnut. :-)) Since moving to MA I've probably consumed more than ever in my life. Doughnut shops are EVERYWHERE here; it's almost impossible to avoid them.

Seriously I haven't had anything sweet (have I? really I don't think so) since I started WW. And it's not about deprivation, it's about learning how to incoporate what you like into how you want to live. OK I think I have talked myself into it!!!! Yay me! lol

Oh my diet today... hmmmm. Breakfast was ok; I tried to go with oatmeal. Once again, living in MA has changed how I view certain foods. Oatmeal here is a work of art. Seriously. You make it with milk (we always used water) and then you add your butter and brown sugar, stir, then make a well in the middle to hold an insane amount of PURE maple syrup. Seriously I never knew how badly Mrs. Butterworth's (or her generic counterpart) was cheating me on taste. Heavenly.

So suffice it to say oatmeal loses any of it's redeeming qualities once gussied up like a song girl on a Saturday night. I decied to go for a mere 2 tablespoons of syrup and no butter or brown sugar. I felt like someone had just told me fried chicken can no longer have the crispy delicious skin on it; it just ain't righ!

I ate half, Aaminah ate some, and I am afraid I ended up feeding the rest to the Shaitaan. Allah forgive me, amin.

So that's that. I'm doing good, maybe even improving, and insha'Allah come Monday, I can move my little "pound at a time" ticker to the right. :-)

Ma salaama ya'll!