Week 3 day 1: hi five!

A'salaamu alaikum ya'll. Yep that's right, I've posted a loss 2 weeks in a row, boo-yah! I lost 1.8 pounds (see my "one pound at a time" ticker for my progress) and I feel ok about that. I KNOW that 1-2 pounds ia a safe weight loss per week, the type that is likely to STAY GONE, and means loss of FAT not loss of MUSCLE. Still... I have that little voice inside that says, if you had just done this or if you hadn't eaten that you could have lost MORE.

But I am ignoring that little voice. I am embarking on a new (physical) me and I don't want to get sidetracked by some invisible nay-sayer. :-) Alright that makes a grand total of 4.6 pounds lost, almost a fiver!!! Another way to think of this is the following:

1. I have lost almost 1 bag of sugar/flour (in the US a 5 lb bad is the norm)
2. I have lost 9 STICKS OF BUTTER. Wow that one is a gross visual but more accurate as it's fat too!
3. I have lost the equivalent weight of over a half gallon of water. Those are heavy to carry!!!

Nasty? Yes. Inspiring? you betcha!!!!

I personally like the above visual. So THAT is why my underpants are looser!!! 5 pounds of fat takes up far more room than 5 pounds of muscle so when we lose fat we notice a definite difference in our appearance, how our clothes look, etc. I am excited!!!

Not sure if I'll post later; I think this should suffice!

Week 2 day 7: early post

Aww, happy lil sun!

A'salaamu alaikum ya'll. I just wanted to do a quick little post for today; I'm going to be pretty busy and not sure if I can get to it later. A quick word on my eating today: I made a really nice breakfast today but I ate very intelligently. Intelligent eating, I like that phrase. :-) I did cave in and buy some mini-muffins (gingerbread and pumpkin) but I only ate one so it fit nicely. A sweet treat without much damage to my points. Only 2!

Some of you might be wondering why I set my goal for only 150 lbs. I know many women would be MORTIFIED to weight that much, especially at my rather dimunitive 5'1" height. (I used to be 5'3" but I have some compressed vertebrae so :-P). I on the other hand really don't like being skinny. Slender. Svelte. Bony. However you wanna put it. I have weighed as little as 140 and really I didn't like how I looked. I felt like I was all bones and sharp angles. I know, laugh it up. :-D I can appreciate that it's en vogue to be thin but I don't desire to fit that mold.

Alhamdulillah I am built solid; I am sure I came from good, sturdy peasant stock, used to carrying baskets of turnips to market. :-)) I don't need to be reassured by fashion magazines that I look good to anyone else. I want to be HEALTHY, I want to be ACTIVE, and yes, I want to be beautiful to my husband.

Beyond and above that, I really couldn't care.  It's very liberating to feel that way, and I will admit I haven't in a long time. I've been unhappy being so round, so chubby, OK, so fat. However, when I am just me, just Jeanna, the way I am happiest with myself, I really don't care how anyone else sees me.

And that is priceless. :-) Ma salaama ya'll.....



Week 2 day 6: doin' good

Underwear denial; it ain't pretty! lol

A'salaamu alaikum ya'll. Alhamdulillah I had a good days in many respects but I did use 8 of my discretionary points. I still have 15 left for the week which ends tomorrow so I am doing great (I am able to use all of them but of course, my weight loss would be on the lower end).  I ate ok but as usual it was my weekend schedule which threw me out of whack.

I ended up getting a kid's meal at Wendy's because I have to drive out to Worcester (22 min away) twice a day on Saturdays to take the kids to their Arabic and Qur'an class.
It never fails, I don't plan correctly and I am stuck grabbing something less than ideal. And to be honest, a part of me wants it that way because I do like that kind of food sometimes. So I try to plan around it so I can do that and not blow my plan.

However I had woken up early this morning (about 4:30 am) and had a small snack and some milk. I have some stomach issues and sometimes if my stomach is empty it really needs some milk to settle it. (I also take medication but I still have some discomfort). So that started my day out with 5 points off. Oh well.

Dinner tonight was really nice. I grilled lean steak and made steamed broccoli, baked yukon gold potatoes, tossed salad, and fresh crusty rolls from the local Brazilan bakery. I guess because I am getting used to not eating as much I just couldn't eat half of what I had.

I ended up eating 2oz of my 3 oz steak, a nice portion of broccoli (point-free and good!) and about half of my potato. Yukon golds are smaller, round potatoes so I really had very little. I took about 1/3 of a roll and shared the rest; really I was satisfied. I save my salad and leftover steak for lunch tomorrow so insha'Allah I will eat healthy.

A good thing about my family is they really like healthy food. Hafsa, my oldest stepdaughter, loves salad without dressing! Zainab, the next in line, will eat anything masha'Allah and Yousef, my husband's youngest, is pretty good too though not as adventurous. Aaminah (my light and joy) will eat anything but she loves a typical Mediterranean meal: olive oil, bread, olives, and salad. Masha'Allah! Anyway it's really not so hard because my husband is also very accomodating; as long as I cook to be healthy and meet our religious requirements, he is all set. :-)

If this is TMI I apologize but I have to share. You know I said in a previous post that because of how I dress loosely and modestly I don't always notice when I gain a couple of pounds (or 15!) Well that maybe true of my outer clothes but inner clothes still tell the tale. So how did I really have to face the fact I had widened my already sizeable load?

I outgrew mah drawers. :-)) Yep that's right, my underpants got too tight. I almost bought a bigger size and then I stopped cold. I was like, what?? Just buy a bigger size, THAT'S your good idea??? Alhamdulillah I started WW that next week. I decided enough was enough when I coulnd't wear my underwear because they had gotten too tight! lol

Sorry I told ya'll this would be honest. You wanted the truth, but can you HANDLE the truth?? lol

Ma salaama ya'll!

Week 2 day 5: a dilemma!

I detest chocolate-covered sprinkled dougnuts but it made the best presentation. lol

A'salaamu alaikum ya'll. So I am sure by now you have guessed what is bugging me: should I eat that doughnut I brought home today or forgo it? Today is the FIRST day I've been totally within my points. To the exact limit, 32. And it wasn't by design. I tallied up my dinner at the end of the night and bada boom, bada bing, there you go.

I still have 30 discretionary points left for the week. 30. 3 0. THIRTY. Wow I am super-psyched. Should I eat them or leave 'em? I really want to post a loss again this week. As I am following plan (staying within my point range) I can indeed realistically expect the same 2+ pound weight loss.

But I am afraid. If  I eat them and I DON'T lose, maybe I'll get frustrated and give up. If I don't eat them, they go away at the end of the week and that's it, they are gone. Hmmmm quandary. :-) I am leaning heavily towards to doughnut right now.

Here is my argument for eating said deep-fried delicacy: Um, hello? What didn't you understand? I just said DEEP-FRIED, the fat girl's best friend. Oh you want more than that? I can wax poetic about a properly made, lightly glazed, light-as-a-feather doughnut. :-)) Since moving to MA I've probably consumed more than ever in my life. Doughnut shops are EVERYWHERE here; it's almost impossible to avoid them.

Seriously I haven't had anything sweet (have I? really I don't think so) since I started WW. And it's not about deprivation, it's about learning how to incoporate what you like into how you want to live. OK I think I have talked myself into it!!!! Yay me! lol

Oh my diet today... hmmmm. Breakfast was ok; I tried to go with oatmeal. Once again, living in MA has changed how I view certain foods. Oatmeal here is a work of art. Seriously. You make it with milk (we always used water) and then you add your butter and brown sugar, stir, then make a well in the middle to hold an insane amount of PURE maple syrup. Seriously I never knew how badly Mrs. Butterworth's (or her generic counterpart) was cheating me on taste. Heavenly.

So suffice it to say oatmeal loses any of it's redeeming qualities once gussied up like a song girl on a Saturday night. I decied to go for a mere 2 tablespoons of syrup and no butter or brown sugar. I felt like someone had just told me fried chicken can no longer have the crispy delicious skin on it; it just ain't righ!

I ate half, Aaminah ate some, and I am afraid I ended up feeding the rest to the Shaitaan. Allah forgive me, amin.

So that's that. I'm doing good, maybe even improving, and insha'Allah come Monday, I can move my little "pound at a time" ticker to the right. :-)

Ma salaama ya'll!

Week 2 day 4: coulda done better

A'salaamu alaikum ya'll. So today was a bit of an off day. I didn't do bad and considering what I would have done I think I did pretty good after all! :-) However my breakfast AGAIN threw me out of what; when will I learn? It seems I wake up every morning and face the same problem. This morning we had pita bread. Yeah, great idea Jeanna. 6 points. YIKES. Plus milky tea. Ah crap. LOL

Lunch was ok; the kids were off school (we had MORE snow subhanallah) and I hadn't really planned on that but it still went ok.

Dinner was turkey ham sandwiches with lettuce, tomato and cheese. I get special bread with more protein and fiber but alhamdulillah I was still kinda heavy on points. Actually it would have been ok without that dang pita bread earlier. lol

So I took 6 of my discretionary points so I could have dinner. Alhamdulillah live and learn. Oh and surprise surprise I am tired tonight so I think this will be a short one. :-)

Jazakum Allahu khair for all ya'lls comments; I prefer to respond individually but until I get over this tiredness/too-business stuff I'll have to postpone. Ma salaama ya'll!

Week 2 day 3: still truckin'

A'salaamua alaikum ya'll. Sorry I am posting so late; I had a couple of posts to finish on my other blog. But here I am, whew!

So today was ok except dang it, breakfast got me again! I was over my self-imposed limit for breakfast but alhamdulillah. For the day I still did ok; surprise surprise I dipped into my weekly points again but just by 4 I think so still that is more than ok.

I think my biggest concern is that while I have made some good changes I should be focusing more on eating healthy but I'll be honest, I'm focusing more on losing weight. I KNOW it won't stay off if I don't make this a permanent change. Insha'Allah I'll do my best to make serious changes, not just "if I can get through 4 months I'll be great" attitude.

My family sabotages me. Oh not on purpose; I am sure, although A loves me greatly, that he will be pleased with a slimmer and trimmer model but man can he eat!!! Of course he could also stand to lose a few pounds but alhamdulillah it doesn't bother me, only for his well-being and comfort. Even if he were to be on a weight loss regimen he could still out-eat me because he does alot of physical work, he's a man, plus he has alot more muscle mass than I do.

Recipe for danger! Alhamdulillah he likes to eat well. Now, granted, he would be so satisfied with some broiled fish, salad, and bread but I cannot for the life of me cook fish. Well maybe a nice filet but once there are scales that need cleaned or a (Ya Allah save me!) a head that needs chopped, noooooo way. I simply cannot. Unless we were starving and even then, if A was too incapacitated to do it, would I consider. :-)

There are a few things I am doing consistently which are helpful. Here they are:

1. I always track/log my food. Always, every bite, ever sip. It makes me more aware of everything I put in my mouth.

2. I am making better choices in regards to added fats (butter, mayo) and avoiding things like my beloved sweet iced tea. I love diet drinks too (I know, they aren't healthy!) so I am sticking with that.

3. I am aware when I do something that isn't really the best choice. If I chose to eat a higher point food or take an extra little snack, I notice and I am learning.

4. My appetite has decreased alhamdulillah. My stomach is getting used to having smallers meals and is shrinking accordingly. Now if only the OUTSIDE would shrink as fast!!!!!

5. I am not allowing myself to feel overwhelmed. If I look at my weight now, and what I want to accomplish, I could get very frustrated very easy. But I will not allow that to happen insha'allah. I will stay the course and if I lose 2 pounds a week, so be it. Until I can get to where I can exercise consistently, I have to be satisfied with what I can do restricting my intake.

So my food highlights for the day: I had hot tea (milk of course!) twice :-( and I ate 3 tiny cookies from a kid's snack pack. No guilt over that though. Oh we had a big snow storm coming tonight and on the way home from the dentist with ALL FOUR KIDS I got pizza from a local halal store. I only had one piece and one small breadstick (half size) plus diet ginger ale. Alhamdulillah I felt satisfied and wasn't tempted to eat more.

Oh and I only bought one pizza for all 6 of us. It gave A 3 slices and the rest of us one each. If I bought a second one, I am sure before I went to bed I would have had another piece. I wouldn't have been hungry but I would have been not full either. Alhamdulillah I am learning my triggers. :-)

OK ma salaama and insha'allah tomorrow will be successful too! Maybe I can sneak some activity in. Who knows? :-)

Week 2 day 2: Not yo nachos!

A'salaamu alaikum ya'll. I am really too tired to post tonight; I've been pretty draggy lately alhamdulillah. I have some muscle weakness and other issues related to my transplant/medications/kidney function so some days (or weeks) are better than others. All the more reason for me to lose this weigh!

I did well today; I dipped into 3 of my weekly points but that's not a problem. I made homemade halal nachos tonight and they were YUM. Ground beef, refried beans, mashed avocado, lettuce, tomato, light sour cream (Daisy of course!) and a cheese-salsa combo. I just measured out exactly what I knew I could have. Alhamdulillah I've cooked for years so I can accurately eyeball 1/4 cup or 3 oz, etc. I set up my plate and that was that. I ate til satisfied not stuffed and feel better for it!

Still struggling with my breakfasts though; I think I just need to find a solution and stick with it! Insha'Allah it'll all work out in the end. :-)

Overall I did fine today with the exception of no exercise. Alhamdulillah. I just feel too exhausted and I refuse to push myself too hard. One days I feel good, I'll go for it, otherwise just watch my eating and insha'allah as I drop the weight I'll get more active and more energy. That's the plan!

Oh I thought I would list a few things that really suck about being fat. Some are funny, some are serious but it's all with good intentions.

1. I hate having a waist circumference that is close to my heighth. lol

2. Bras in my size are EXPENSIVE!!! $35 is the norm. Ya Allah!

3. If another car parks too close to mine, it's embarassing have to squeeze through the opening. :-)

4. I hate having no energy; it takes most of what I got to drag this load around!

5. People judge you. OK fair enough, we ALL do that in one way or the other. But no one likes it.

6. Always afraid maybe the seat belt on the airline won't fit. Bad one. Alhamdulillah I am not like the misakeen people you see on tv specials but I'm round enough to be afraid. Verrrry afraid. LOL

7. I opted not to write this one. I'll address it on my other blog when I don't feel so sensitive about it.

8. Being worried your husband won't be attracted to you or AS attracted to you.

Alright that's enough. Of course there's more, like how difficult it can be to meet the hair-removal requirements of our religion when you're a chubster but I think that's 'nuff said. :-)

Insha'Allah see ya'll tomorrow. Ma salaama!

Week 2 day 1: Read 'em and weep!

A'salaamu alaikum ya'll. So as you can see by the little weight loss ticker above all recent posts, I lost 2.8 pounds my first week. Yay! As we all know, safe weight loss is from 1-2 pounds per week. Of course, knowing that I still had this dream that somehow my dormant/non-existent metabolism would kick in and I'd be the super-star of weight loss, the Jared of WW, and lose an astonishing 7 pounds my first week. :-D But alhamdulillah I am more realistic than that and was really pleased with my 2.8

That is, until my best friend L, upon being asked, "Guess how much I lost?" guessed some very crazy numbers I was no where near attaining. LOL Silly of me to ask. :-)

Anyway so now I am into week 2 and alhamdulillah I really feel up for the challenge. Tonight I made homemade spaghetti but had a very reasonable serving plus my green leafies before hand so I think I'm really getting the hang of it. Before I would have had maybe another half serving; not piggishly overeating but eating until I was FULL not just satisfied. Alhamdulillah I am learning the difference; even a mere extra 200 calories a day will result in a pound every 3 months or so. A pound of pure FAT that is. Ick. So I feel good about every little gain I make, as long as it's positive!

I got applauded at the meeting. :-/ lol I like to share my successes or failures but dude, ya ain't gotta give it up for me. I was like um ok thanks. THEN I got a star sticker! Which I promptly gave to Aaminah. LOL She was my little meeting buddy.

My total diet today was a bit weird (I say that everyday right? lol) but that's because I didn't wanna eat before meeting and have that weight of the food and drink sitting in my gut. So afterwards we went to the mall (it was -8 here today at times!) so I could walk around and let Aaminah ride the carousel. We opted for a roasted chicken sandwich which we shared but still the pointsplus value of it was unbelievable (to me). I would have preferred to have gotten either a bit more food for the point cost or something decadent (like a mini cinnabon cinnamon bun). lol Alhamdulillah live and learn. :-)

So please just stick in here with me and please feel free to write about your weight loss struggles and successes. We CAN inspire each other. Really I try to think of the sahaba, of the Prophet Muhammad saws, who so often had little food to eat. Of course I also thinkg of the hadith which mentions (paraphrased) a 1/3 of your stomach for food, a 1/3 for water, and a 1/3 for air. Subhanallah. May Allah help us all strive to follow the sunnah of our beloved RasoolAllah and Nabi. Amin!

Day 7: boo-yah!

Day 7, week one. Oh yeah!

A'salaamu alaikum ya'll. So I feel I am ending my week on a high note! As I said before, I have 32 points per day plus an extra 49 points a week for discretionary calories. :-) I was kinda strict on myself in the beginning; well except for the day 1 fiasco with McD's. lol Anyway I kinda hoarded them a bit but invariably used 4-5 a day mostly due to my breakfasts being too high point (in my book anyway).

So imagine my surprise when tonight came and I have 17 of the weekly points left. Yes! I was excited. I know they are there for me to use (which as I said is important in and of itself) but the less of them I use (while feeling satisfied) the higher my weight loss will be. Then factor in my one day of real exercise plus the painting we did today and I am feeling like I have indeed made some positive changes this week.

I am feeling very different about my approach this time. I like structure and accountability; I think WW gives both. I believe it will be a good fit for me as long as I make these into lifelong habits, not just a daily chore until I reach my goal. Insha'Allah I'll be more successful at making it a part of our life. :-)

Let's see my diet today... oh yeah we usually have belgium waffles on Sundays. I used to make homemade pancakes but 1) Can't get White Lily flour here, the ONLY flour a true southern cook will use and 2) the belgium waffles are AWESOME not like Eggos. lol Anyway I calculated the points and even with only eating one, by the time I added the maple syrup and pat of butter, was gonna be 7 points! Not even counting the scrambled egg and turkey sausage.

So I took one strip of Aaminah's. That's 4 squares of waffle. LOL But I had the taste, which I enjoyed, without using a huge chunk of points and ending my week kinda crappy. (If I said this word at home, Aaminah would tell me, "Mama, say 'astaghfirallah' cause you said a bad word. Masha'allah!)

With my truncated waffle serving I was even able to have my hot tea (made with milk, never water!) egg and turkey sausage. I felt satisfied NOT stuffed. So I consider this a win.

Lunch was nonexistant. 2 of my stepkids go with their mom on Sundays (alhamdulillah! lol) so it was just me and Aaminah plus Zaynab and A. Aaminah wasn't feeling hungry (little under the weather) so we all just kinda fended for ourselves and had breakfast for supper. Ah B4S, how it saves a time-crunched mama! We were busy with painting an apartment today and I really just didn't have eating on my mind.

I am hoping by next week I can make some realistic healthy menus everyone will eat. Alhamdulillah my entire family really are healthy eaters but of course there are some things my husband just doesn't like. He never insists I do not make them but I like him to be satisfied with his supper after working all day so... we compromise. :-)

Alrighty, thanks for following along and tomorrow I probably won't wait until night to post. I am sure I have good news!!!!!! Ma salaama ya'll...

Day 6: homestretch!

I realized I started making my "stick jeannas" very thin so I tried to rectify it with this one. :-)

A'salaamu alaikum ya'll. I've been doing really good! I had a few slip-ups but actually stayed within plan. I have one more day to go before my new week starts and still have TWENTY weekly points left. To put it into perspective, that could be a really nice treat like a piece of cake or even a dinner out (within reason). So I am happy; I don't feel I NEED to use all the optional points but I am happy they are there.

I guess it all comes down to the psychology of weight-loss. Anytime something is forbidden we desire it more; this is something humans have to struggle against. For example, when I was on dialysis I craved liquids; I would sneak more than my alloted measly 32 ounces a day. Yep that's right, severe fluid restriction when your kidneys fail. However, once I had my transplant I would have to force myself to drink enough. Uh-huh, THAT makes sense. lol

So I am aware of how the human psyche works. I would probably be salivating bad for something sweet or greasy or all-around yummy but because I know I CAN I don't. Uh-huh, THT makes sense. lol But it is what it is and I am happy its working.

Alhamdulillah I am also more aware of my choices in general and feel a little guilty if, while staying within my plan, I don't eat the right amount of fruits or veggies. I really want to make a consistent change, a lifestyle change as it's pc to say now. I really dislike our politically correct culture but it's true; you have to make a lifestyle change, not diet. :-)

Today was another weird eating day. The kids had Bukhari school (weekend Islamic school) and we were running late so I just made a mug of hot tea with milk and little sugar to take with me, along with a 100 calorie (3 points) snack bar. OK so that's alright. I didn't really eat lunch; once again just our schedule on Saturdays. Insha'Allah once I get better at this, I'll be more consistently healthy in my choices which includes eating all meals. :-)

I am excited to weigh in on Monday; a safe weight-loss is 1.5 to 2 pounds per week; I know that. Of course we all want to lose 5 lbs a week and still be safe and healthy. It's not; if you go past the 2lbs a week you are usually burning muscle for energy not your stored fat. It's much easier to break down muscle than fat btw so that explains how you keep your paunches and pouches but seem to be weaker. I want to maintain my muscle mass plus tone it up a little but NOT bulk it up like a weight-lifter. Ewwwwwwww!

I intended to get to the gym today but I have to have someone watch Aaminah. Of course, the girls here will do it (my stepkids) but Aaminah is very attached to me and doesn't like me to be out of the house alhamdulillah. :-) Then A doesn't like me to be outside of our home after maghrib (authentic hadith which substantiates this) so unless it's necessary I do not. Of course, the gym might be different since it's on the same floor inside the building; Allahu alim I'll ask my husband. :-)

OK I'm gonna go; I have to get dinner on. It's late; we usually eat by 6:00 and it's 6:32 and no supper insight. Insha'allah I won't be fired. LOL Yeah right.

Ma salaama ya'll and healthy living! Wow, that sounds incredibly weinee. I'll just leave it at ma salaama... :-)

Day 5: a little treat and a little work

Please note the pink face, true to life after my exertions! :-)

A'salaamu alaikum ya'll. So today was Jumuah (Muslim holy day) and I decided to do two things: one, I excercised for the first time in a long time, yay! The second was I decided to have a little treat (halal philly cheese steak sandwich) and YUM! It actually didn't do too much damage; I only ate half and shared it with Aaminah so it was doable. I really wanted something kinda substantial and a little greasy and this satisfied both!

For the exercise I used the gym located embarassingly near my front door. :-) I did 15 minutes on the elliptical machine. Really that was alot for me for the first time. I burned about 150 calories; on the WW plan you can exchange your exercise for points redeemable for extra food but alhamdulillah that wasn't my goal. I just wanted to start making movement a part of my day. Insha'Allah next time I will take a pic of the gym; I think ya'll will be impressed!

I hope you guys enjoy my cartoons; I know a couple of you said I did. It's fun and doesn't take much more time than searching the net for a pic PLUS this one is customizable. Anyway it's my blog my rules and I like 'em sooo :-P haha

I've done really well today but still need to work on my breakfasts (I think). Insha'Allah it will come with time. I have to remember I weigh in on Monday morning; I think this is a good thing for me. They do it privately, meaning only the receptionist sees but that's one more person in on it. I think I'm gonna place one of those little tickers on my blog to track my progress; masha'Allah they are so cute!

OK thanks for keeping up with me; I can't wait until I make some good progress. You know, I already feel pretty good about my changes even if I haven't seen any changes yet. I admit, I am a scale person. I like to see the numbers drop. I think realistically my first "yay!" moment will be when I drop below 200 lbs. To see 199 again... I think the last time I did that was in India, due to some weird microbial infection in my gut. Oh pleasant times lol

Well I have alot to do tonight so this one is a little short. Please be sure and keep up with me so I can get more inspired! Jazakum Allahu khairan ya'll!

Day 4: reality setting in

I do love me some cheeseburgers!!!



 A'salaamu alaikum ya'll. So yesterday I was grooving with broccoli and today I am salivating for some flame-grilled MEAT. What did I do? Compromise! I made grilled chicken tonight for supper; super easy, pretty fast, and it was really good. Plus I really grilled it (30 degrees doesn't scare me!) so it was really juicy and brown. Yum. I do all the grilling at our house because my husband tends to char-broil everything. All over. :-) So I am the grill-master extraordinaire! Masha'Allah .:-)

I was 6 points over today but it comes off my discretionary points. I looked back at my tracking to see where I am consistently going wrong. I have two "hotspots": morning and night. :-) I mean, my breakfast tends to eat up (in my opinion) way too many points. A mere tbsp. of the spreadable butter is THREE points. Yikes! I can have 3 oz of grilled chicken for that. So I need to get out of my comfort zone in breakfast for sure.

My other problem is the nighttime. Now to be exact. I always crave somethng right about now. I stay up later than the rest of the family to log some uninterrupted computer time and invariably I get hungry. Plus I have to take my nighttime meds and they really hurt if I take them on an empty stomach. My food of choice in the past was cereal with milk; easy fast and pretty light but still it eats into my allotted points. I have to take my meds on a 12 hour schedule so I can't really play around with it. Ah well insha'Allah (Allah willing) it will all work out!

Oh and activity, yeah that's my other problem. I don't do any. lol I mean I cook, do laundry, clean, shop, chase Aaminah but still that isn't sustained aerobic activity. Have I told ya'll my dirty little secret yet? I have a gym where I live in my apt. building. On the same floor. 5 doors down. It's shameful, I've NEVER been inside it. I am a little shy because of course I wear hijab so I sweat quite a bit with little effort and I dont want people walking by checking out my red face. Oh no and thank you no. Insha'Allah I'll get over this little fear and just go do it and people be damned. At least that's my intention, we'll see. :-)

OK I guess that's a pretty good update. I enjoy keeping this blog and I would really enjoy some comments from you guys! Guess there's alot of pressure because I only have 6 followers right now but insha'Allah that will change. Then ya'll can take turns. Still waiting on my bestfriend L to follow. L for loser? Hmmmm guess I'll remove this WHEN she becomes my follower. Um on my blog, not my personal follower. That would be weird.

Ma salaam !

Day 3

A'salaamu alaikum ya'll. This isn't going too bad. OK yes I know it's just day 3, what do you want from me? I've made good choices for the most part and definitely an improvement over my method before. What was that you ask? I just ate whatever I wanted when I wanted with no thought. :-)

Today's diet was a little weird; I needed to get to the grocery store so it was kinda odds and ends you know? But alhamdulillah I only used 3 extra points. Let me explain: all foods are assigned a point value. In the new WW program, PointsPlus, a food isn't just rated for it's calorie intake, making an apple the same as 100 calories of cookies. They take into account the protein, carbs, fiber, and fat so the better choices have a lower value while the bad choices (higher fat, etc) have a higher value. Thus helping you learn to make the better choices for your body insha'Allah.

I am allotted 32 points a day plus I have 49 weekly points I can use as a splurge. I used 3 of those today and of course since this is my first week and I didn't have exactly the right foods in place (and my day 1 trip to McD's of all things!) I am actually down to 35 "discretionary" points. I like this system and I really like being accountable, having to go to a meeting and weigh-in. I don't need the support from others at the meeting just the accountability and oh yeah I guess their praise when I lose. That'll be nice. :-)

Anyway for dinner we had a slice of multigrain cheese pizza with some turkey pepperoni thrown on and steamed broccoli on the side. Aaminah asked for it; it is one of her favorite vegetables masha'Allah. I also had leftover shorba for lunch with a pretty big salad and in general am just getting a little better at my planning and implementation. I really want this to work for me so insha'Allah I'll give it my best try!

I was thinking about what is my main motivator for weight loss. Of course I ain't gonna lie and say I don't care how I look. I want to be more beautiful for my husband. But really and truly I want to feel good, to have energy, to WANT to play outside with Aaminah, to hate sitting on the couch collecting dust. :-)

And I want to insha'Allah be here for my children as they get older, get married, have home and babies. I want to be able to be a help to them. With my myriad of health issues (namely my kidney disease and transplant) I feel a little more keenly than others that my time in this dunya is limited. I really want to be here to see my daughter grow and to meet her children, see the woman she will become insha'Allah. So I know I need to do my part and try to take even better care of myself.

Insha'Allah see ya'll tomorrow. :-)

Day 2

It's not about fashion, it's about faith! :-)




 
A'salaamu alaikum ya'll. Don't you love my catchy title? :-) I think it's just easier this way. So today was not too bad, I think I did pretty good although I do need to get some stuff out of the house to make way for healthier options. Of course, A always eats pretty healthy (you know the mediterranean diet minus wine) it's how he grew up: eating whole foods, lots of fish, olive oil, etc etc. I grew up eating biscuits and gravy, friend chicken, mashed potatoes, and coleslaw. lol Not really fair huh? Pretty sure I am genetically programmed to love butter and mayonnaise and white bread. LOL

Anyway on to my day. Here is a breakdown of what I ate:

Breakfast:

sm. whole wheat roll
one egg
2 turkey sausage links
8oz tea made with milk
Hmmm not too shabby eh?

Then I had a snack. One I didn't check the points on before partaking of. Ouch.

16 wheat thins (this is 1 serving)
1 oz cheddar cheese.

This baby set me back about 8 points!!!!! I was like what? So lesson learned: wheat thins yummy but not as nutritious as the "wheat" part makes you think! OK on to lunch.

Leftover marqa (still waiting to post this recipe on my other blog!) made with beef, carrots, potatoes, and brussel sprouts. YUM
romaine lettuce salad with cucumber, carrots, and 2 tbsp russian dressing.

OK looking better. The marqa is surprisingly low in points (non-starch veggies have no points) so it's a good healthy filling way to eat. Then came dinner and it was ok really but not great. A wasn't hungry so I made something the kids like. Equals prepackaged and fattening!

Homemade mac-n-cheese  with 3 cheeses and spinach
one turkey hotdog for added protein

I knew this would be a bad choice so I ate less. I also had a bit of fruit thru the day, 2 pieces. On WW fruit doesn't count towards your points; I guess the idea is you need these things and if you had to spend your points for them, what would most of us go for? A cheeseburger or a cauliflower? Yep you got it. :-)

Anyway I wanted to measure myself today but as of yet haven't dug out the tape measure. I'm kinda premenstrual and super tired (again!) so maybe tomorrow I can post. I have alot of ideas for posts running thru my head but no energy to write them. :-)

I'm looking forward to Monday and my weigh-in; I really hope I "do the team" proud. And thanks to all of ya'll who have already expressed an interest in my struggle. It does help to have accountability. Jazakum Allahu khair!!!

Oh I looked for a good before picture but guess what? I am the original floating head. Facebook shot, whatever you call it. I can't find one of my body or even many of my face from farther away because I LOOK HORRIBLE. I would delete them as soon as they popped up on my screen.

Insha'Allah I'll gather up the courage to also take a good before pic. Really I don't wanna do it but I know it will be a good thing for me. See I suffer from too much self-esteem. I like myself, really I do. I tend to think I am pretty and nice looking and yeah, I sometimes suffer under the delusion that I am hot. LOL Then I'll get a real glimpse of myself and to be honest, I'm shocked! I am always like, who is the fat girl in my clothes?? LOL

So my chores: find tape measure, jot em down, and take a very candid pic. Ewwwwww <shuddering> it ain't gonna be purty, ya'll! But you love me for the sake of Allah swt so it's all good. :-)

Ma salaama.....

First post (aptly titled)

A'salaamu alaikum ya'll. So this is gonna be my weight-loss journey blog. I decided to make a separate blog for all stuff related to me being less fat. I really want to update it daily (hmm we'll see!) and I didn't want that to be the focus of my personal blog.

Or of my life but... until I get it figured out it looks like it's gonna be. You know I even tried to put off starting this blog! One thing then another and it was 11 pm. Time for shower and bed. But I was so refreshed afterwards and felt like such a loser for procratinating that now, at 12:10 am, I sit here, doing my first post.

I weigh 231.2  Yes, .2 pounds. They are very particular it seems over at weightwatchers. I have a childhood bestfriend who was overweight all her adult life; she joined WW a few years ago and really just feels amazing. She is even a meeting leader or whatever now in W VA; any of ya'll live in Meadowbridge, give her a shout out. lol

Anyway so there is the number. Daaaaang it's big. B I G big. Not just Big. Oh and I will use self-deprecating humor; please don't tell me to love myself. Loving myself is what got me to 231.2 pounds. :-D I don't use humor as a shield, I use it as humor. I find it funny; if you are appalled by fat jokes, move on. It'll just be easier this way.

I guess if you are here you know me from my other blog (more than likely). So you know I am a proud and unapologetic Muslimah alhamdulillah! You also know I am a wife and a mother and those are my 3 biggest joys in this life. Oh and then there is food. Yes food, beautiful food, how I love thee! I can covet a culinary work of art like other women might covet a new diamond bracelet. :-) It's one of my interests, cooking and eating, thusly... we are here.

Umm I think I am rambling a little sorry. I'll get back to the program! OK so I chose WW. I have divulged my weight. I intend to take my measurements and keep up here with my inches lost. I won't post those for obvious reasons but I'll do a running tally of my losses.

I would like to say something in all seriousness. It takes alot to open up to others about your weaknesses. Food has become one of mine. Not in the "my precious" creepy kinda way but in the "I cook for a small army and by dangit I'm gonna eat it too!" kinda way. Coupled with the "too tired to move my ever-widening rear end off the sofa" way and well.... recipe for disaster.

You might be interested in this very precise mathematical formula I derived. Oh and yes, the original artwork is by me. :-)


Or if you do get them tied, you tie them towards the outside, not centered, cause you have to put your leg up on your knee to reach the laces. lol

 OK so (sigh) I am very tired now and just realized, as I have a fingerpad for a mouse, I could have found a stylus-type instrument and actually drawn a kinda decent little sketch. I'm not too shabby at art but my finger tracing left a bit to be desired.

I've run out of time and energy to post what I ate today. However I will leave you with this:

After I left the WW meeting, I took Zainab and Aaminah out to McDonald's and promptly ran through the rest of the points I had for the day. LOL Ain't life sweet? Subhanallah. :-)

See ya'll back soon, salaam!

Oh yes, right. I just figured out little stick figure Jeanna will be the picture posted by my blog entry. Oh well, no followers yet so it's all good! :-)